Another birthday has passed…
Yesterday I celebrated the first day of the last year of my twenties. It’s bittersweet. I have had a lot of great things happen in my twenties. I moved to a new city, gained a husband and have worked at 3 great but different companies. But most of all, I have learned more about myself than I ever imagined. I think back to my early twenties and realize I thought I knew it all. And I did know it all…in the most immature way. My mentality was full of expectations, fulfilling a timeline that I thought I was right for growing up and being selfish about who I was and where I wanted to be in my life. It was about me and only me. And I look back now and think how naive I was to feel that way. My life is not just about me, and if I continued living with the same expectations I had back then I would be miserable and most of all, if I tried to follow a timeline I had put in place for myself I would be…confused and quite frankly, wishing that I had gone a different route. I had no idea what these last 9 years would bring although one thing I can say for certain is that I now go from having little expectations to expecting the unexpected. And that is what keeps me going. I have learned that it is not about me but rather, the people who I have surrounded myself with that have made me. That timeline that I had has changed so much from what I had planned or what I saw in my future, that it now, to me, was simply an excerpt in a journal entry that was a passing thought. And I am all the better for having gotten where I am today with the people I have kept close, on the the road I have taken.
Growing up, birthdays were a big deal in my family. Not because we threw extravagant parties or because we got expensive gifts. But because the people that surrounded me growing up made you feel special on your birthday. As I get older, all I hear is people saying they don’t want to celebrate and its “just another birthday” and blah blah blah but really…why not celebrate it? Especially if you are as lucky as I am to have people that love you so much to make you feel so special. There is someone out there for everyone on their birthday to make them feel special…whether its a parent, sibling, relative, friend, child, spouse, significant other, boss, doctor..or even a pet. So why not embrace it? Give in to the feeling that its not “just another day” and celebrate yourself. Because…why not? It’s the one day (or in my case month ;)) of the year that you are allowed.
Mr. Dr. was working an overnight call in the hospital. I was ringing in my birthday with a great friend at a local bar. As soon as it hit midnight I wondered who would be the first to text or call to recognize the day of this gemini’s birth. For a minute, I thought it would be a facebook notification from a “friend.” Which as I write that sounds ridiculous because with social media these days it could be a random friend from middle school who I haven’t seen in years and probably will never see again except for a photo on facebook but if they happen to be on the FB at 12:01 they might see that it’s my birthday and acknowledge it. Hmmm. Is that what it has come to? Fortunately…as my thoughts wandered, I felt a vibration on my phone. Oh thank goodness I thought. It’s a text and not a facebook notification…someone really does love me. And there he was…my knight in shining scrubs struck again…with a happy birthday text. While I had hoped he would be the first to wish me a happy birthday, I also knew that he was either busy at work or squeezing in a few minutes of shut-eye on his long shift so I didn’t expect it…but I was so very thankful he did and that he was the first. He knew it would be make me feel special. It may sound silly but it gave me a slight twitch of justification that despite how long the years of med school and these last 2 years of residency have felt, he is the man I think he is. I am lucky. So as cheesy as it sounds, I embraced the last year of my twenties knowing that I have great family, friends and of course a great blogging community that welcomes my crazy, funny, happy and sometimes even inappropriate thoughts, antics and feelings. I will cheers to that
Happy Cocktail Friday and I hope everyone enjoys the long weekend.